Wednesday, November 19, 2014

The To Be or Not To Be Moment: The Two Roads

Yayyyy! I left an awesome job in Mumbai to start a startup on the night of 18th October 2014, and  today here I am thinking about what to do, and what not to about it. I don't know whether this is normal for every startup before it's first version or not, but I'm worried a lot about the first impression! What if the first impression makes users mark the product as one of the most useless sites ever visited? Ohh man! (In Joey's voice from Friends) That stain will be hard to remove from the minds. Re-build? Oh yeah I will, but what if someone else builds upon the experiment in a better and faster way? Ohh man! (Yeah, you got the voice)

Ok, whenever in trouble, always listen to the kid inside you! That's what I believe in, even though I know it sounds silly (winks). I have just noticed many times that children always give the most awesome answer (Ok, not always, but let me believe that thing!).

Let's weigh my options, possible outcomes and then decide what to do, and what not to.

Option 1:
Quit the idea, and apply for a job somewhere! Go easy way man! Promotions, guaranteed salaries, and what not? No tensions, no worries, nothing to fail about, nothing much to be tense about! Everything will be fine. Just activate your Zen mode O:)

The kid's verdict:
No way dude! What were you saying the day you had founded your first startup What were the Knights dreaming about at that time? You wanna let them down? The Knights were dreaming about battlefields to conquer, they were dreaming to change the world forever! Yeah, they were dreaming to make a dent in the universe! They were ready to take any challenge head-on! Right? You had promised the Knights in your mind to never let them down and keep fighting no matter what it takes!
As a result, you had promised yourself that you will only work: for an exciting startup, or for your own startup.

Option 2:
The idea won't work? Fight! Users won't like your first version? Fight to awesomeness! You will fail? Fight harder not to fail the NEXT time! Fail hard, Rise up harder than that!

The kid's verdict:
I just remembered this: "Why do we fall? So we can learn to pick ourselves up!"

The plus points of this option?
1. An awesome life full of adventures!
2. Lots of failures, and lessons to pick yourself up again and again only to rise stronger!
3. Lots of ups and downs to tell my grandkids about. ("Oh man" moment!)
4. Rise and rise again, and again!
5. An attempt at making a dent in the Universe!

The negatives in this option?
1. Regret - Why didn't I just take the first step in Nov 2014 when I had the chance? I had left a job only for this, and still? I had left and came all the way back from Mumbai for a reason right? So I should have fought for it!
2. A normal day to day life. (Yup, that's a negative for me. I hate the "normal".)
3. Not trying.


Enough of points, way to go for Junkmat!

Friday, October 3, 2014

Dream On! The Mystery Called Life

Aahh! The question what is life has always kept me puzzling, and it still does! What is it exactly? Just a bunch of living organisms on a planet left to take care of themselves while they are alive? What is their purpose? Who left them? Who created them? What are they doing by their existences?
Ok, I know these questions are enough to make a brain explode, but still, WHAT ARE WE DOING HERE?

Juhu Beach, Mumbai. 26 July, 7:11pm

Religious people say we are here to get to God, to do good to every other being and be good in the end. Others say we are here to just enjoy whatever comes up and not worry about the thing called purpose. Whatever be the view of people, the question of our purpose on Earth still keeps ringing bells in my head, a sound-less bell. It just makes me feel de-motivated, to give up on everything and just lay idle because whatever my purpose is, I'm automatically supposed to get there and finish it right? Why should I go after the so called "purpose"? Why? I'm still searching for this question.
Meanwhile, this is just a thought that comes to my mind many times, and the only answer to silence it is staying quiet, mentally, as A Peaceful Warrior movie has taught.

Oh, if you haven't seen that movie, it is a must watch! Go man go see it first then read the remaining post! Go go go!

Anyway, if you're still reading, let me write more of my random thoughts.

Whenever in a dilemma about my purpose in life and things like that, I just think about the only purpose that everyone should have: to bring peace and joy in everyone else's lives, to make the world a peaceful place, with no borders, no discrimination, just harmony. Even if the world seems without purpose to me, if one can bring joy to anyone, there's nothing like that! If you can make people happy, there's nothing like it! If you can make people genuinely smile, simply nothing like that! :)

So I'm going ahead, once again, with a smile on my face and a hope in my heart that I will succeed in doing this to the world. Hatred never does any good, love for all living beings does!

Good night time. Aah! 2am!

Sunday, September 14, 2014

5th July 2014- The Biggest Jump of My Life: Dreams vs Love

10am of 5th July '14, I woke up as usual, probably because Mom must have sat beside me asking me questions on purpose so that my brain gets activated and I wake up. Yeah, that's how she succeeds in waking me up! (Although extreme case involves use of water or very cold hands too!)

It was a nice morning and as usual I had a nice breakfast all set for me to attack but still, something deep down inside me was troubled. Anyhow, I enjoyed the breakfast as much as possible, although the "trouble" within was getting intense with every passing minute. It was an inside battle between a big change in life and ending a chapter which I was reading for the last 22 years.

I had just finished my graduation in May 2014 and started a job hunt in mid June to join the startup culture of India. Being an enthusiast for startups, I always believe startups to be the sources of innovation. I just love the idea of not having to follow what everyone is following and going on a different path. The adventures, break-downs and feelings of hope and hopelessness every now and then is what makes me feel alive, and I just love it! The feeling of doing something against all odds, when no one hopes you to succeed just because you are not "experienced or professional" and yet you going after the idea with all you have got is simply AMAZING!.Yes, that's what I would always want to do, till I breathe my last. As the startup culture in and near Patiala is almost negligible, I had to move out, and the night of 5th July was the time when I had to turn to the next chapter.

I had always lived with my parents right from birth up to that day. I could feel the nervousness of going to a new place all on my own, and not living under the warmth of their love anymore. A part of me wanted to scream "I don't want this change! I want to stay as I did till now! I want my Mom to wake me up daily! I want to talk to my Mom-Dad and sister as usual WITHOUT any change!", but I had to silence it. One of the toughest things in life is knowing when to silence your feelings, and when not to.

The Air India flight from New Delhi to Mumbai, 6 July '14, 9:21AM

Needless to say, the other part of me which was happy for the journey ahead was excited, and full of dreams to Just Do It! I just thought about how my parents also must have been struggling with the "trouble within", having to part with someone they love dearly, as I do. And yet, all I was seeing was a smile on their faces, with just a few concerns but no worries. They chose to see the brighter side while I was still battling the Dreams vs Love thing inside me. The smiles inspired me, made me rise above the battle to choose both: Dreams and their Love, with a few adjustments here and there, and a hope that we'll all be soon living together again, in yet another chapter that I will begin.

Soon, it was 9pm, and I was to leave at 9:30pm towards IGI Airport New Delhi via bus along with Dad. May be it was too much over-eating during the day, or the feeling of parting for a long time, I just was not in the mood of eating anything and lied to her: "Mom, I'm not feeling hungry at all!", and yet she managed to make me eat the Custard she had made. I still remember it's taste! :) Yummy it was.

It was time. Everything to go ahead was ready, and awaiting me. I will always remember the hug Mom gave at the last moment till eternity. She was all smiling, yet her hug was sharing the same "trouble" as mine. With determination and promises in my mind, I smiled back at Mom -Dad and Dee-dee because deep in my heart, I knew they are always with me, no matter what.

The journey called life is all about moments after all. Make sure you treasure the best ones!

Mom Dad and Deee Deeee,
Love you till eternity!! We will be together soon! :-)
"Noooo Deee Deeee NOOOOOOO!" :D

Just Another Life, On It's Journey

Life: A beautiful journey in which you discover and define yourself. I am one such traveler, and today starting this blog to write down whatever comes in my mind.

Many times it occurred to my mind that I should just start writing out my mind in a blog, but I always side-lined the idea thinking why blog? Why not just write a diary for myself? Why sit in front of a glowing screen and write out my heart? Well, the "glowing screen" won the argument with the reason: may be there might be another traveler out there who might like and get inspired to keep loving the journey. Yeah yeah, I know it is like a one in a Billion shot that someone might be inspired by something written by me, but why should I keep my life closed? I want to be an open book. I want to write my heart out to the world, no matter what. Only thing I won't do is cause any kind of harm to anybody out there.

Caution to self: Will be brutally honest about MYSELF.

Caution to reader: While writing, I won't think about how you will see me after reading my post. Creating a fake image isn't something I would like to waste my time on.
Also, I'm not a writer. I just write whatever comes to my mind, without much thought of giving it an artistic feel.

And as they say in games, "Let the Blog begin!"